Monday, July 9, 2018

Monday Murder

On the stage of an abandoned theater, the Mixologist sits slouched in a red, velvet-lined chair. In his hand, he holds a glass filled with a viscous, red concoction. Countless scars mar the flesh of his arms, and his mouth and cheeks are splattered with the crimson liquid.


Behind him, a body dangles by its ankles, creaking as it sways above an ornate, glass decanter. The bottle’s narrow neck captures only a fraction of the mixture draining from the throat of the corpse.


The Mixologist takes a sip from his glass and grins, already thinking about mixing up his next drink.

The Mixologist by Neefu is a flash fiction piece centered around a man who likes to drink a specific mixture of blood, but he's not as discerning as he believes himself to be. While the character, Cummings, transcends both vampire and serial killer in a creative way, the writing style is sloppy.

The POV switches between Cummings, Jonathan and Meagan, which is fine, but towards the end, the POV switches yet again and it simply doesn't fit with the previous POVs. I think it would have flowed more smoothly if all of The Mixologist had been told strictly in third-person narration.

Last, but not least, I tried to google Hyra for a proper sense of the name, but couldn't find any reference to the way it's used in the story. I think Neefu needs to include an author's note at the end. I feel the name would've had more of an impact, if I was familiar with the source.

As always,
AstraDaemon

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